Friday, September 27, 2013

When facebook goes wrong.

I woke up this morning and did the first thing anybody does these days, check Facebook.
In the midst of many ecards and TGIFs there was a post with some animal abuse. Thank you jerk for completely taking away any joy I had.
While its your page and you can post whatever you want, I think people are taking things to a new level now days.

Please take my guide of things to post and not to post, lets elaborate:

Cute cats- Thats easy, cats own the internet, there can never be too many cute cats.
Pets- all other form of pets are also acceptable, unless they have no legs or too many legs. (My rule for being okay with animals, 2 legs 4 legs ok, no legs and too many legs no)
Kids- It be babies, toddlers, your kids graduation. It is ok. Unless you're posting birthing videos and pictures then no, please keep those to yourself, locked up, your kid will never want to see that. In fact I dont really know why people take videos of their birth.....not doing it.
E-cards- They're hilarious. And sarcastic. Two wonderful things
Cute cat videos- Again, cats, moving, go google frankenstein cat. Its priceless.
Funny ish- Now this one is a little vague. But if it makes me laugh, if its a quote, a picture, a video, we are okay.
Family pics- This includes "my and my boo". and any form of family together. and #tbt's.
Vacation-  I want to see where you went on vacation since I cant afford a vacation of my own. Also applies for road trips and hikes to the mountains.
Food- I love food. #foodporn right? Does not apply to weird green shakes and kale. I personally dont care much for any diet food really, I want to see the good stuff. But if it makes you feel better about sharing your diet food that is okay.
Transformation pix/stories- Adding this one on. Motivation!!! Do not take that as I want pictures of you constantly at the gym though, no. Nobody should take pictures at the gym. It makes you look like a douche.

Things not to post
Constant political- Keep that to yourself. The only thing I want to see about political is IM VOTING or a I voted little sticker. The President sucks posts are getting old. Please go to an online forum to discuss politics if you must.
Constant religious- I believe in God. Do I need to read 50 posts about religion a day? No. Facebook is not a church. And I'm sure I have friends of all different religions who some may not appreciate constant posts about religion. One here one there alright, but again why not share it with people who would appreciate it more.
Dead animals- Why? Seriously, why do you think it was a good idea to post that?!!! No I'm not gonna watch the pitbull getting beat up video. The "Im spreading awareness through facebook" is lazy. Please go help out at an animal shelter. If I wanted to cry with animal videos I would turn on the tv in the middle of the night and watch the ASPCA commercials.
Abused humans- Again another one I don't understand why you would spread that. I'm pregnant and very sensitive right now, I don't need to see that!!! And honestly most of the time those stories are fake. Oh this also implies the please donate to such and such microsoft will donate....surgery....no. its fake.
The drunk/high pics-  If you don't want your mother to see it don't post it. I don't want to see you more than half naked. Look those pictures will be up forever. Good luck getting a job thats not at McDs. While on the topic, could really care less about your weed, remember while its legal in WA its not federally legal so I'd keep those to text your homies.
My life is so horrible-  Please get off the internet and go make friends. That is your problem.
Pics asking for assurance-  Come on writing "Im so ugly" on a pic should be illegal. If you thought you looked so ugly you wouldnt have posted it. This also refers to those annoying vague posts. Just stop with the annoying "SO mad" "Why?" "I dont want to talk about it" Please delete your facebook.
Pretending a reddit post is yours-  One of the worst offenders. I like reading it on reddit, when you try to pass it off as your own it just ruins it. Didn't you learn in school that plagiarism is illegal? You should all be reported!!!!!

I'd like to think that with these guidelines my newsfeed would be completely cleared of stupid things, but I know better. But hopefully if I can at least reach a few people and change their ways.....
And I know someones going to say why don't you just delete so and so or unsubscribe them. Yeah what if they write something really good one day?!!? I hope nobodys excluded me or theyll be missing out on this epic blog post.
And it had nothing to do with being pregnant....eh

So next time you post something, think about the guidelines. They may save a life.




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