A napkin and ice

To most it is just a cloth napkin, ice and some paper towels.
To me, it meant the world.

I'm 18 weeks tomorrow and still the morning sickness has not left me. The past two weeks have been especially hard at work as one of the managers has been out because of surgery. I've been opening the restaurant every day at 5am. On my Saturday I was extremely sick. I did my opening duties and went into the office to work on the rotation sheet. I couldn't keep anything down and the trash can and I became best friends. At one point one of my servers came in the back with a bowl of ice a napkin and some paper towels. He said "Here you go momma I know you get hot and it makes you feel sick." (The back office has a no form of ventilation, we have a fan but it basically blows hot air in your face). I looked back at him and had no words to explain how much I appreciated his gesture.

I'm not someone who likes to ask for help. It's hard for me to do that, I feel weak, and I know asking for help isn't weak its quite the opposite of that, it takes strength to ask for help. While pregnant I've encountered a lot of ignorance from people, people who see pregnancy as a disease, people who think you can't do anything because you're pregnant, the list is ridiculously long. So showing one sign of being under the weather has really been something I'm trying not to show.

Many of the people at work have had kids (none of the managers). One of my server's assistants had 8 of them!! They understand that some of their pregnancies might have been easy, but mine wasn't a trip to Disneyland. As a Supervisor I am the person always checking on them making sure they're okay and not overwhelmed, but they became that to me also. "How are you feeling?" "Hows the baby" "Its definitely a boy". That connection made me the person that they went to if they had an issue. One day I had taxi issues and didn't get to work until about 5:40, I was crying and freaking out about what was going to happen. When I got in, they had already done their side work, opened the silverware cage, opened the office and everything was set. They could have came up with excuses, slacked off, or only done their job but they chose to go above and beyond and help me out.

Compassion isn't something that you teach someone, it comes from within. I can "coach" my associates how to properly serve a table, how to clear a table, to carry trays correctly. But I can't teach them compassion, that is all on their own. If I've learned anything from this experience its that you get what you put out into the world. I could have gone into this job and quit after finding out I was pregnant, I could have gone to work done my job and went home every day. I chose to stay, to build relationships and have a connection with them.

These 5 months of work haven't been easy. I'm not someone who boasts and throws things in other people's faces. But if you think that you can make it working at 5am every day with a full buffet (eggs, cant ever eat them again). While "feeling hungover" and smelling every European's cologne/perfume within a mile of them. I give you my most respect.
 But the days where nobody will get a break and I get them some pizza from room service and I walk into the room to see everyone sitting next to each other on the bench and smiling and thanking me, it makes it all worth it.

I just want people to know that being pregnant or not, the smallest things you do to someone else can change the world to that person. Have you ever had a day where you wish someone would have just given you a smile? Too often we are so caught up in our own problems and issues that we don't take the time to reach out to others. The thing is, nobody knows what someone else is going through. As a society we've learned to hold our pain inside. Many people walk around with a smile on their face to hide their pain. If someone were to reach out and help another with their pain they may realize that they're helping themselves as well.

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."
—Leo Buscaglia


I promise you, as silly as a napkin and some ice sounds, I will never forget that.